I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize