sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
