If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
