You can't motorboat a personality
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
