So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
