well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
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