I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I had to cum in my sink.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
