What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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