She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I think people are normalizing furries
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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