I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
