summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
