Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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