Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
