Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
