Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
