hotel room ftw
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
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