dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
