he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
