problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize