So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
