Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
