ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
