ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I party with great urgency now.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
