if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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