hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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