I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
