You made me cry and you don't even care
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
