Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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