Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
