none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
If its not for food we ain't going out.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
