two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
thus making me awesome and them whores
this just has baby written all over it
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
