So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
