I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
