called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
