he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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