Everything about him screamed your future.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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