Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
