I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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