Plan B is the new Plan A
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
and you said cock pushups were impossible
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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