He asked to "fluff my boner.."
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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