you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize