4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
