i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
