my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
