It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
