so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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