The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
