I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
