All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
