Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Found the puke drawer
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
